And since it is an open secret that with their appearance they 'address' members of the stronger sex, read who has more success in this! What does he think about her way of dressing, and isn't saying?
ARIES
Well, darling, was your looks today inspired by a church program? Where are the proud breasts, that fascinate people? And the rest of curves? Why are you hiding them in that sack? And what are you trying to do with this beige and grayish colors - to camouflage?! To blend with the wall so that no one sees you? The world won't stop if you add a little red, is there a nicer color than that? At least on the lips. It's as if I'm looking at a black and white photo. Huh, I'm going out for a walk, don't wait up.
TAURUS
What On Earth is this, a woman or a hedgehog? Hands like sandpaper! One nail 'missing', others with peeled polish! Hair like a reed! Hello! Where are all those mighty products from TV commercials (whatever they are called)? And what's that rug you've got on? That gives me creeps! The World won't stop if you wear something silky, swaying. The only explanation is that you are trying to save on a softener. The only one! And a little perfume wouldn't hurt. At least samples in magazines are free.
GEMINI
I think I've stumbled across a time traveler. And she's proud to say that she's found her own style and doesn't want to change it. She's had the same hairstyle since high school. When she showed me her old picture from a driver's license, I got goose bumps, man! She hasn't changed at all! Imagine that next to you every day in the same clothes and the same 'style', forever and ever! Whoa!
See also: MEN'S WAY TO SHOW LOVE: HE DOES THIS FOR YOU, BECAUSE HE LOVES YOU IMMENSELY!
CANCER
Leather jacket, ten earrings on each ear and looking where to put the next piercing! Black shadow on eyes, purple on lips! Ooooh, and black nails! From head to toe in the same color. Are we at a funeral? I wouldn't be at all surprised if she pulled a rod or a whip out of her purse. Just like Dracula's cousin. And now when I look at her - what did I like on this girl? I should better look for holy water and garlic.
LEO
Sorry, dear, are we going out like normal people or you're really wearing that? What on Earth are you wearing, like all your clothes got burned in the fire! Is that all you have left – a small shirt and torn shorts? You wouldn't lose anything if you wore something... more decent. I'm not asking for anything expensive, I know times are hard, but something that will show your figure ... in a good way. Not like this now. Everyone will turn head to look at you, but in disbelief!
VIRGO
Tell me you got stuck at work, so you didn't have time to change your clothes. Or wash your hair. Look at you honey. Out of courtesy, I say: 'Never mind, it's important you're here now'. And while you're talking, instead of looking into your eyes, I stare at your greasy hair. And when I look down ... straps of worn out bra protrude from the blouse. I look down a little more, just so I can get rid of bad thoughts and ... what's that? Mud on the heels? Oh, baby ...
LIBRA
Okay, I'm a man and as a woman you must know better ... But tell me, please, does that purse go with those army boots on your feet? And the combination - pink floral tights and black-blue striped sweater? Should I be telling you this?! How can you not see it yourself? Or you think I'm so blinded by your charm, since I'm always polite and telling you only nice things, which I don't see your ... 'mistakes'. On the one hand, you tell me you appreciate when a man's got good taste, and on the other you're like a walking circus. Is that normal?
SCORPIO
What the hell is this? Are we watching 'Little House on the Prairie'? Dressed as a little girl, skirt with flowers, bobby pins in her hair as if she's ten. Instead of a bag, she's carrying a scary backpack shaped like a sheep, and proudly telling me that she bought identical to her niece (who goes to first grade!). She looks like someone who has to show ID card when buying alcohol. And then she wonders why I don't call. Because I don't want to play your guardian, honey, that's why! Dress like a woman, and we'll talk.
SAGITTARIUS
When I saw her, I was shocked. Rhinestones on her nails, rhinestones on the eyelashes, glitter all over her face. She should have warned me to take my sunglasses! I'm blinded. Not to mention that I can't touch her because she's being guarded by the wall of 'decorations'. She also has a feather scarf with something that looks like wings, like a Christmas tree. All she is missing are lights that turn on and off. And all this just for going out to a coffee shop. What will she do when we go out somewhere in the evening?!
CAPRICORN
She came to a date in a plaid shirt, swaying and quite open, under which she wore a T-shirt with a print and on her feet - tall boots. As a Canadian lumberjack who's going out for a beer after work. Shock! Honey, I didn't tell you to dress up as a bridesmaid at the wedding, but when you show up somewhere at least be tidy, feminine, polite. I don't want to go out with a sixteen-year-old.
AQUARIUS
I hope she has a built in GPS, because I will lose her in this crowd. For God's sake, are they all wearing uniforms? They are all the same, like water bottles on a shelf in the supermarket. I could barely recognize her from behind in the crowd. Perhaps I could see from the front, if it's not too dark. Sorry, but can't you show some inspiration and originality in your dressing? And she manages to tell me that some things are not modern, so she doesn't wear them. What I noticed is that fashion trends are dictated by smart women, so what is it with you?
PISCES
I got scared when I saw her. I agree that she should emphasize her beauty, but she's gone too far! Too much cleavage, too naked legs, five layers of mascara on her eyelashes, huge earrings and untamed hair. You simply don't know from what side to approach her and get to her. Are you afraid that her hair may fall off and stay in your hand! So how can a man adapt to this?
