1. When you want to draw attention to yourself:
a) I go to a store and arrogantly throw dollars on a bunch of Louis Vuitton wardrobe
b) I study and impress people with my brains
c) I go out with my charisma and they have no choice but to notice me
2. With a man I first notice:
a) eyes (even when he's not ugly)
b) an extract from the cadastre
c) shoes, watch and belt. If these are white, I give him my gay friend's phone number.
3. On the first date I say
a) that I am looking for a husband and that I want to have four kids
b) 'I want a fur coat.'
c) I usually say nothing and flash my eyelashes because men like stupid women.
4. If I find out that the man I like is married:
a) I give up, cry to my friends, yell that all the men are the same and that the next man will pay for all.
b) do whatever I can to make him get a divorce. Whole countries fell apart, so why wouldn't a lousy marriage?
c) So what! I'm married too.
5. My favorite number is:
6. Sex is:
a) What the brightest star is to the Moon, that's what satisfaction in bed is to me.
b) I just want to get married, I know who will do that part.
c) If he doesn't do too well, he will look at me as if I were the God.
7. Are you prone to cheating?
a) I would rather say curious and adventurous spirit.
b) OMG, I can't even find a boyfriend, let alone a lover!
c) My man is the only one for me, and as for him, he can do whatever he wants.
a) I have a doll collection. Blow up ones.
b) I don't have time for a hobby, I'm too busy spying on my boyfriend.
c) handy crafts.
9. Do you want children?
a) Sure, I need to have someone I will turn against my husband when he cheats on me.
b) I'm more up for the adoption of a 20-year-old mongrel.
10. Why do you want to get married?
a) Because it is socially acceptable. What good are two PhDs I have, career, success and the fact that I am happy, if everyone's feeling sorry for me because I'm a loser who failed to get married.
b) We misunderstood. I don't want a husband for myself, to get married. I want to find someone else's husband!
c) Because I need someone who is legally obliged to listen to me talk.
a - 2 points
b - 4 points
c - 6 points
SOLUTION: It doesn't matter how many points you scored, it's important to get married!
20 – 39 points
BUY A CAT
Sweetie, let's be honest, you won't get married for the next three reincarnations. What you're looking for, it doesn't exist: to have bank account balance in the amount of the annual budget of a small Arab country, the body of Tarzan, small computer in his head, pleasant mother who likes you and always keeps quiet so that you'd be right. Let's be real, nobody is that pathetic. You'd better buy a cat and watch TV series. If you know what I mean...
40 – 59 points
Your criteria will drop to normal expectations only after you're 35. When your face starts to get wrinkled, then you will realize that he doesn't have to be perfect and then you will even settle for that already balding 40-year-old who is way shorter than you and still lives with his mom because it's easier than having to cook and clean himself. After all, why should he live alone when no one loves him more than his mother anyway. But look at the bright side, no one cooks better than his mother, so you won't have to bother about the kitchen because you already lost in the beginning. Chaos.
Sweetie, you don't have to worry about anything! You belong to that fine group of those who can, when they want and to whom they want. This is probably because you can perfectly play a girl with an IQ of an average geranium and because you shaped your body asymmetrically? It's the only explanation, because men don't like smart and beautiful women who don't depend on them. Sometimes we have to pretend to be helpless and incapable of replacing the light bulb and let them show off around the house as winners because they think that we would be doomed if it weren't for them to replace the fuse. A smart woman plants her plans inside a man's head and convinces him that it was actually his idea. Then they strut like peacocks because they had a perfect idea, and actually a woman got what she wanted. If you know what I mean...